From pain to purpose—and a practical path to lead with the Holy Spirit
When you meet Bristan Heaven, you quickly sense two things: a tenderness forged through pain and a steel-strong conviction that leaders are meant to operate at full capacity, not conformity. His story travels from a fractured relationship with his father to a life of reconciliation, from a safe six-figure banking career to Spirit-led executive leadership and coaching through Kingdom Reach Leadership.
This is more than another leadership framework. It’s a call to partner with the Holy Spirit, to heal what’s underneath, and to move with clarity, confidence, and capacity.
The turning point: forgiveness that unlocked a future
Bristan’s early years were marked by absence and transactional interactions with his father. In seminary, living in the same city as his dad yet never seeing him, bitterness took root. On a Father’s Day years later, Bristan sensed a clear nudge: “Forgive your father.”
When he called to obey, his dad’s first response—“That’s your fault”—lit a fuse. But a gentler voice whispered, “Tell him he’s right.” Bristan owned his bitterness. The line went quiet. Then came three words neither expected: “God bless you.”
That moment opened a path of intercession, generosity, and patient pursuit. Over time, God softened both hearts. Bristan realized he’d expected from his father what his father had never received from his own dad. The cycle broke.
Leadership lesson: You can’t lead at full capacity if unforgiveness is constricting your heart. Reconciliation releases spiritual, emotional, and strategic bandwidth.
The risky yes: leaving comfort for calling
By 2020, life was good: strong income, rich benefits, vacations planned, a clear path upward in banking. Then prayer redirected him. The confirmation? His wife:
“I feel safer with you obeying God than staying where it’s comfortable.”
Bristan stepped into fractional executive leadership and coaching—helping leaders, ministries, and organizations pursue clarity, alignment, and sustainable growth with God at the center.
Full Capacity vs. Conformity
“You were created to lead at full capacity, not conformity.”
How? Bristan points to Jesus’ humanity. Christ never “cheated” by leaning on divine privilege; He modeled Spirit-dependent leadership. That same partnership is available to us. Talent and hustle matter—but partnership with the Holy Spirit is what distinguishes Kingdom leadership from generic self-help.
Difference from mainstream self-help (e.g., Tony Robbins):
- Commend skill. Excellence stands before kings (Prov 22:29).
- Add partnership. Where ability ends, God’s wisdom begins.
- Operate in realtime. The Spirit offers in-the-moment strategies for people, markets, and moments no playbook can predict.
Pain: paralyzing or empowering?
Pain can freeze you—or forge you. For Bristan, surrendering pain to Jesus turned his story into strength for others. That same transformation is available to leaders who refuse to numb, deny, or white-knuckle their way forward.
Takeaway: Unresolved pain lowers your leadership ceiling. Healed pain becomes power, empathy, and discernment.
The Kingdom Reach Pathway: Alignment → Assignment → Accomplishment
1) Alignment (Clarity)
Hear what God is saying. See what God is doing. Clarity ends confusion and anchors confidence.
Example: In a strategy session, a single Spirit-led word produced a breakthrough so significant the client spontaneously multiplied the fee. Clarity creates disproportionate outcomes.
2) Assignment (Confidence)
Know with whom and where God is asking you to partner—today. Jesus never separated Himself from the Father; Kingdom leaders don’t separate their leadership from the Spirit.
3) Accomplishment (Capacity)
Grow into the measure required to finish well. Vision without transformation stalls. Capacity is the result of formed character, sharpened skills, and ongoing communion with the Holy Spirit.
Warning: Finishing well isn’t automatic. If you don’t grow, you won’t. But if you submit to formation, you won’t just finish—you’ll finish well.
Choose your path (and count the cost)
Kingdom Reach serves organizations and individuals through:
- Business Path: Fractional leadership and organizational strategy (clarity → profitability → sustainability).
- Individual Path: One-on-one executive discipleship and leadership growth.
- Strategic Disruptions Path: For front-line leaders ready for high-stakes Kingdom assignments. Not for beginners; this is for those already battle-tested and called to contested ground.
Not every fight is yours. Some battles are avoided by wisdom; others are won by obedience.
A final question for leaders
Where will you be in 100 years—and what will you be doing?
What you do with Jesus now determines where you’ll be.
How you walk with the Holy Spirit determines how you’ll be living and leading—forever.